Referees escorted off the ice for their safety ... parents fighting in the stands and berating coaches ... players skating away from the game because it isn't fun anymore. Reality check for kid hockey.

The kids on the Armstrong Bantam Falcons had a story to tell, the kind of tale that is forcing youth hockey in Minnesota to change its rules, the sort of incident that has administrators seeking a shift in Puck Culture. In a game last month, a Champlin Park player was ejected for fighting. He was, Armstrong coach Mike Schon said, "going ballistic."Then, at the end of the game, as Armstrong players left the ice, the Champlin Park player burst out of his locker room.He "jumped one of our players," said Eric Seaburg, 15, an Armstrong player. "In some games, things can get out of control."

Minnesota Hockey, the governing body for youth hockey in the state, has decided it's time to regain control.A bold new initiative beginning this winter aims to change an increasingly troubled landscape by educating players -- and especially parents -- to concentrate on skill development, fun and effort, rather than victories or illusory dreams such as scholarships and pro contracts. It has two main components: a broad Hockey Education Program (HEP) encouraging more practices and fewer games and the Fair Play plan that penalizes teams and parents who misbehave."In order for behavior to change, you need to enforce rules and reward good behavior," said Mark Jorgenson, Minnesota Hockey's administrator. "There has to be a bite in it."While hockey teams usually get two points for a win and one for a tie in league standings, the Fair Play program awards an extra point to a team whose penalty minutes remain within prescribed limits. Exceed that limit in a game -- or draw misconduct penalties against parents or coaches -- and the team fails to win its Fair Play point.Although the system could result in a team with fewer victories but more Fair Play points finishing higher in the standings than teams with stronger win-loss records, a similar program in Canada has shown that teams that shun goon play in favor of skilled play win more often.Working with the Sports Medicine Center at the Mayo Clinic, Minnesota Hockey leaders will be collecting information on penalty minutes, fan behavior and other indicators to see if the new measures keep players safer and on skates.If, in the context of traditionally rugged Minnesota hockey, this all sounds a little, well, wimpy, some say it is."Essentially, the enforcement of the rules has gotten so lax that Minnesota Hockey is trying to step in and put another layer of rules in that aren't necessary," said Bob Brooke of Eden Prairie, the former Olympic and NHL player and father of a teenaged goalie. "To say we need Fair Play points to change behavior of coaches, players and parents is ludicrous," he said. "Penalties? We have power plays to deal with them. Why do we need something else?"Save our sportThe beating death of one hockey father by another in Reading, Mass., in 2000 was a wake-up call for youth sports.But there are plenty of signs of trouble in Minnesota as well, report Minnesota Hockey leaders who cite recent incidents including: • Referees escorted from hockey arenas for their own safety.• Parents fighting in the stands.• Coaches enduring cascades of verbal abuse from parents wanting to see their child play more minutes.• Other coaches barging into locker rooms to scold opposing players and coaches.• Teenage referees humiliated by angry parents."How do we end the parents' sports rage?" asked Dave Bakke, Minnesota Hockey's vice president for planning. "How do we put fun back in the game? How do we stop attrition?"

According to Minnesota Hockey figures, kids and adults alike are finding such problems overwhelming.

More than half of all hockey officials quit after their first year on the ice, and 50 percent of all boys who start playing hockey at age 8 or younger have abandoned the game by the time they are 14.State youth hockey leaders say skill levels have waned as young teams play more and more games -- some as many as 70 in a season -- practice less and travel more. "Our kids drive for hours from Austin to International Falls and then get to touch the puck for 67 seconds during a game," said Dr. Aynsley Smith, a Mayo Clinic sports psychologist who helped design HEP. "Success shouldn't be judged by the number of motel rooms you stay in."The reform efforts also are rooted in a growing realization that youth hockey is not the NHL's farm system and that players and coaches shouldn't mimic pro tactics."Youth hockey isn't entertainment," Jorgenson said. "Youth hockey isn't about selling tickets. We educate."Parents, experts say, need the education the most."There's a reverse dependency trap for parents," said sports psychologist Frank Smoll, who recently conducted a workshop for area parents and coaches and wrote the HEP booklet. "Normally, children are dependent on their parents for how they stack up against others and for their self-worth," said Smoll, who teaches at the University of Washington in Seattle. "But, sometimes, as a result of parents identifying with their children, it's the parents who become dependent on their children for a sense of their own esteem. Parents put pressure on their children to excel, and if they don't, it's the parents' ego that suffers."Spreading the wordHEP encourages coaches to use a "mastery approach" that contrasts with what Smoll calls an "ego-oriented" climate that demands only results and punishes poor play with harsh criticism.So far, the Minnesota program has been explained to coaches via their once-every-three-years education sessions and at other district meetings.But a handful of parents interviewed at recent games in the Twin Cities had only a vague knowledge of the program. They hadn't received training or the booklet by Smoll and Smith."We know we need to do a better job," Jorgenson said.A mass training session held at Xcel Energy Center in St. Paul in September attracted about 1,700 people, but only 25 percent were parents, Jorgenson estimated."Parents don't perceive their problems," Smoll said. "And the parents who do show up, of course, are the ones who need the training the least."There has been discussion among Minnesota Hockey leaders to require parents to attend a HEP workshop before their kids can play. For now, that's not mandated.But some kids wish it were. "The worst I saw was a parent showing up drunk for a game and yelling at the referee all game," said Nick Johnson, 15, of Plymouth, who plays for the Armstrong team.Andy Hels, 14, of Crystal, another Armstrong Bantam, doesn't like it when his parents yell at him for a bad play or at referees for bad calls. "It ticks me off," he said. "It's embarrassing."But he's not sure the new program will have much effect on the ice. "Your mindset is so much on the game that you're not going to be worrying about [Fair Play points]," Hels said.It's also unclear how HEP and Fair Play will flourish when, once the NHL season resumes, the "SportsCenter" highlights will be marked by fighting and super-aggressive checks, as reality beats up on idealism."We in Minnesota could sit back and say, 'You know, we've lost the battle. Let's just give up on it,' " Jorgenson said. "But we haven't and we won't.